Who was Julius Harden, or as most people called him Jay? He was as you could imagine like most a father, a brother, a son, a husband, a grandfather, a great grandfather, an uncle etc....But he was SO much more than that.
Julius "Jay" Morton Harden was born March 31, 1927 in Anniston, Alabama to Leonard Horace Harden(29) and Vera Ellen Bell(17). He was the eldest of 10 children and grew up during the Great Depression era so was no stranger to hard work.
He joined the Army Air Core on November 2, 1945 and served his country well during WWII.
He married Ruth Carolyn Belston on September 15, 1951 at 24 years old. She, having been married before, brought to the marriage two sons. He was an instant father, took on that role and loved the boys with all he had. They went on to have three more children together. Two girls and a boy, bringing the total to five.
He was a foster parent. He and his wife Ruth took in numerous children waiting to be placed in permanent homes. My mother being one of them. With five children of their own the courts told him "no" he could not adopt my mom and at that time his best friend had shown interest in adopting my mom. He threatened to leave the country, go to Mexico with the child and no one would ever seen them again if he didn't get custody of her. Needless to say the courts granted the request and my mom was adopted into the Harden Family at one year old.
He was a grandfather. My grandfather. I wish I could sit here and tell you all the stories he told me growing up, but I can't. He was a quiet man and not a man of many words. Jay believed the dinner table was a place to eat not a place to talk, and while he had no problem with everyone around him talking he was not much for conversation. It become and game for me and my brother to try and see if we could clean our plates before Papa did. We never did beat him.
He taught me how to whistle, I'll never forget it. He wasn't even trying to teach me. He always would whistle while he was working or making pottery and being young I tried copying him. It was one night laying in bed at his house that I finally whistled for the first time. I jumped out of bed to tell my mom who wasn't as excited as I was. I was seven and it's something I will remember the rest of my life.
He was also the first person I told when I got saved. It was February 1994 and I was watching a movie with my mom. In the movie a lady drowned and I remember asking my mom if she was going to heaven? And She told me "hunny I don't know. If she didn't accept Christ as her Lord and Savior, no she wasn't going to heaven." I made the decision right then and there to accept Christ as my Savior. She was excited that I had made that decision she wanted to call her mom and tell her. She dialed the number and handed me the phone. Papa Jay answered. "Papa I got saved tonight!" That's the last thing I remember. I wish I would have remembered what he told me, anything. I don't even remember talking to my Grandma that night but I will cherish the memory forever. He was the very first person I told all those many years ago.
He taught me how to love unconditionally. He was married to my grandma for 56 years. The last four were very hard on both of them. Ruth had developed Alzheimer's after having a stroke in 2003. She became hard to understand, hard to cope with and hard to handle. Because of the disease she could become mean at the drop of hat. She would get angry if you didn't come for dinner. She would leave the house, walk down the street and forget how to get home. She thought most days were Sunday and she needed to be in church. Through all of this my Papa took care of her. He loved her with a love unfailing. He would bring her home when she got lost. He would remind her that we live in Chicago and can't just come over for dinner. He was patient with her when she would be upset. He would give her her favorite ice cream. He would take her to church on Tuesday and whenever else she wanted to go. He did everything he could for her right up until the day she died in 2007. He never put her in a home. He never said this was too much. He did it because he loved his wife and would do absolutely anything for her.
He was also a;
friend
potter
artist
jeweler
business owner
ceramic maker
business man
christian
hard-worker
Mr. Fix-it
Coast Guard vet
and much much more
It's the season of Thanksgiving and while I mourn the loss of my Papa, I am thankful he lived 88 years and for 26 of those years he spent being my Grandfather.
I am thankful he is in Heaven with his wife and they are dancing together again. Desi and Lucy - My Papa with his dark good looks and my grandma with her fire red hair. I miss you both now and will one day see you again.
While we do not grieve as those who have no hope, still we grieve.
Harden, Julius M. "Jay"
Julius M. "Jay" Harden, 88, a WW II Veteran and member of the Greatest Generation, went to Heaven November 14, 2015. Jay was born March 31, 1927 in Aniston, Alabama to Leonard and Vera Harden.
He is survived by his children Michael J. Harden and wife Susan of Albuquerque, Terry L. Harden and wife Cathy of Campbell, CA, Deborah S. O'Rourke and husband James of Albuquerque, Jeffrey L. Harden of Albuquerque, Patricia L. Ackerman and husband Rob of Rockwall, TX and Wendy D. Nieto and husband Ray of Naperville, IL; 16 grandchildren, Diana, Joseph, Jason, Ashleigh, Becky, Cynthia, Kenneth, Jon, Megan, Bethany, Melody, Krista, Jackie, Marcus, Aarika and Roman; 15 great- grandchildren including Micah, with whom he shared a birthday; and many family and friends, including his beloved Pekingese, Lola.
Mr. Harden was preceded in death by his parents and his beloved wife of 56 years, Ruth, and grandson Christopher.
He was a proud veteran serving in the US Army, US Army Air Corp and the US Coast Guard. Jay was an honest, hard working man of integrity who once bought a house on a handshake. His like is seldom seen today. He trusted in God and we are comforted to know he is in Heaven.
Services will be Friday, November 20, 2015 at 10:00 a.m. at Chester T. French Memorial Mausoleum Chapel, 924 Menaul Blvd. NE with burial following in Sunset Memorial Park Cemetery. Friends may visit Thursday, November 19, 2015 from 4:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. at FRENCH - Lomas.
Please visit the online guest book for Jay at
www. FrenchFunerals.com
FRENCH - Lomas
10500 Lomas Blvd. NE
(505) 275-3500
Julius "Jay" Morton Harden was born March 31, 1927 in Anniston, Alabama to Leonard Horace Harden(29) and Vera Ellen Bell(17). He was the eldest of 10 children and grew up during the Great Depression era so was no stranger to hard work.
He joined the Army Air Core on November 2, 1945 and served his country well during WWII.
He married Ruth Carolyn Belston on September 15, 1951 at 24 years old. She, having been married before, brought to the marriage two sons. He was an instant father, took on that role and loved the boys with all he had. They went on to have three more children together. Two girls and a boy, bringing the total to five.
He was a foster parent. He and his wife Ruth took in numerous children waiting to be placed in permanent homes. My mother being one of them. With five children of their own the courts told him "no" he could not adopt my mom and at that time his best friend had shown interest in adopting my mom. He threatened to leave the country, go to Mexico with the child and no one would ever seen them again if he didn't get custody of her. Needless to say the courts granted the request and my mom was adopted into the Harden Family at one year old.
He taught me how to whistle, I'll never forget it. He wasn't even trying to teach me. He always would whistle while he was working or making pottery and being young I tried copying him. It was one night laying in bed at his house that I finally whistled for the first time. I jumped out of bed to tell my mom who wasn't as excited as I was. I was seven and it's something I will remember the rest of my life.
He was also the first person I told when I got saved. It was February 1994 and I was watching a movie with my mom. In the movie a lady drowned and I remember asking my mom if she was going to heaven? And She told me "hunny I don't know. If she didn't accept Christ as her Lord and Savior, no she wasn't going to heaven." I made the decision right then and there to accept Christ as my Savior. She was excited that I had made that decision she wanted to call her mom and tell her. She dialed the number and handed me the phone. Papa Jay answered. "Papa I got saved tonight!" That's the last thing I remember. I wish I would have remembered what he told me, anything. I don't even remember talking to my Grandma that night but I will cherish the memory forever. He was the very first person I told all those many years ago.
He taught me how to love unconditionally. He was married to my grandma for 56 years. The last four were very hard on both of them. Ruth had developed Alzheimer's after having a stroke in 2003. She became hard to understand, hard to cope with and hard to handle. Because of the disease she could become mean at the drop of hat. She would get angry if you didn't come for dinner. She would leave the house, walk down the street and forget how to get home. She thought most days were Sunday and she needed to be in church. Through all of this my Papa took care of her. He loved her with a love unfailing. He would bring her home when she got lost. He would remind her that we live in Chicago and can't just come over for dinner. He was patient with her when she would be upset. He would give her her favorite ice cream. He would take her to church on Tuesday and whenever else she wanted to go. He did everything he could for her right up until the day she died in 2007. He never put her in a home. He never said this was too much. He did it because he loved his wife and would do absolutely anything for her.
He was also a;
friend
potter
artist
jeweler
business owner
ceramic maker
business man
christian
hard-worker
Mr. Fix-it
Coast Guard vet
and much much more
I am thankful he is in Heaven with his wife and they are dancing together again. Desi and Lucy - My Papa with his dark good looks and my grandma with her fire red hair. I miss you both now and will one day see you again.
While we do not grieve as those who have no hope, still we grieve.
Below is his obituary....
Harden, Julius M. "Jay" Julius M. "Jay" Harden, 88, a WW II Veteran and member of the Greatest Generation, went to Heaven November 14, 2015. Jay was born March 31, 1927 in Aniston, Alabama to Leonard and Vera Harden.
He is survived by his children Michael J. Harden and wife Susan of Albuquerque, Terry L. Harden and wife Cathy of Campbell, CA, Deborah S. O'Rourke and husband James of Albuquerque, Jeffrey L. Harden of Albuquerque, Patricia L. Ackerman and husband Rob of Rockwall, TX and Wendy D. Nieto and husband Ray of Naperville, IL; 16 grandchildren, Diana, Joseph, Jason, Ashleigh, Becky, Cynthia, Kenneth, Jon, Megan, Bethany, Melody, Krista, Jackie, Marcus, Aarika and Roman; 15 great- grandchildren including Micah, with whom he shared a birthday; and many family and friends, including his beloved Pekingese, Lola.
Mr. Harden was preceded in death by his parents and his beloved wife of 56 years, Ruth, and grandson Christopher.
He was a proud veteran serving in the US Army, US Army Air Corp and the US Coast Guard. Jay was an honest, hard working man of integrity who once bought a house on a handshake. His like is seldom seen today. He trusted in God and we are comforted to know he is in Heaven.
Services will be Friday, November 20, 2015 at 10:00 a.m. at Chester T. French Memorial Mausoleum Chapel, 924 Menaul Blvd. NE with burial following in Sunset Memorial Park Cemetery. Friends may visit Thursday, November 19, 2015 from 4:00 p.m. - 6:00 p.m. at FRENCH - Lomas.
Please visit the online guest book for Jay at
www. FrenchFunerals.com
FRENCH - Lomas
10500 Lomas Blvd. NE
(505) 275-3500
Loved your post about your papa, Jackie. Praying for you guys. <3
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! I'm so sad but happy to know I'll see him again
ReplyDelete