Friendship

“But Amnan had a friend…who was a very subtle man.” – 2 Samuel 13:3 

Friendship is important. We need to be able to share our hopes, dreams and fears with one another but we also need to be careful who we let into our circle of friends. 

I remember my grandfather preaching about this subject when I was a teenager and at the time had no desire to pay attention to what he was truly saying. Now that I’m older I appreciate the words that surprisingly still ring in my ear. Grandpa Ray use to tell my father “Tell me who your friends are and I’ll tell you who YOU are.” It’s something my father still tells his kids to this day. I would encourage you to make time to read 2 Samuel 13 today. The bible heeds the warning about friends in this passage.  The short version of the story is that Amnan was so “in love” with one of his half-sisters, Tamar, that it was making him sad. His friend Jonadab comes in and asks Amnan why he is so sad. Amnan tells him because he is in love with Tamar and can’t do anything about it. Jonadab encourages him to take what he wants, and they devise a plan together. The plan is that Amnan will pretend to be sick and will ask the King to let Tamar come and make cakes in his room for him. When Tamar shows up to the room Amnan tells her to sleep with him and when she refuses he forces her. After he defiles her he HATES her more than he had LOVED her. This starts a family feud and Amnan ends up dead by the hand of Tamar’s brother. There are so many lessons within this text, such as the lust of the flesh but to keep it simple for today it all started out because Amnan had a friend and this friend was a bad guy who gave unwise advice. 

Who we hang out with is so important because we are a reflection of those people. If we associate ourselves with debbie downers or negative people, we then will become just like them. A bad apple in a basket of good ones does not turn itself good again; it makes all the other ones bad! 

I began thinking about all this friendship stuff yesterday when we had a guest preacher and he said “don’t be fooled, some people come to church, sit in the pews, do “God’s” work, but are not spiritual.” Basically they do all that stuff to get the praise of man. They don’t do it for God, they do it to look good. Church is not a place to show off your new clothes, hairstyles, cars or babies. Church is not about YOU it’s about GOD. Church is not for you to talk about your kid, it’s a place to worship GOD.  Etc.

Some people have had a hard time with me making my friend list smaller. They think that it’s mean, they think I’m judgmental, they think I’m doing it for no reason but this is the exact reason why I have plucked out a few people from my life. I need to be surrounded by people who will build me up, who have the same mind set as myself, and who are going to encourage me to do what the Bible says. The Bible warns us about having friends who direct you down the wrong paths and I’m doing myself a favor and getting rid of said people. I definitely don’t want people in my life doing things for the praise of man, showing off their possessions, or trying to belittle me in any sort of way. We’re here to encourage each other and we’re here to remind each other that our purpose is Spiritual. 

I encourage you to start looking at your friends list and start eliminating the WEEDS. Surround yourself with people who love GOD and want to please him. You will begin to see a change in your life and the positive attitude that comes with it. When you’re in the will of GOD I believe you get blessed by it.