I just wanted to answer a few questions after our first year of marriage. Also, I want to get a new series going called Wedding Bliss Blogs - Basically talk about everything that had to do with our wedding, our engagement period, how to prepare for vendor meetings, DYIs, hacks, money saving tips, etc. So I'm really excited about that but let's get started with these questions.
When do you feel like you were ready to get married?
I was ready around the 2 year mark of our relationship. I knew this was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was my best friend. He says he knew he wanted to marry me when I said we would do whatever it takes to get him through the $50k surgery he needed to have. It clicked for him in that moment that he just knew I was the one for him. Money wasn't an issue - I cared more about him and his health.
How long was your engagement?
We were engaged for one year. We got engaged on May 2, 2014 and our wedding was May 15, 2015. I specially asked for him to give me a year to plan the wedding because I wanted to enjoy my time as an engaged couple and really experience my time planning my wedding. I have a few friends who I know got married less than a month after the proposal and it worked for them but I knew that I wanted a longer time to really just be relaxed about the whole thing. I didn't want to be running around like crazy. I really took my time with everything.
What is your favorite memory from the wedding day?
I think having all the people I love in one room partying with us and just finally being married! We were together 4.5 year by the time we tied the knot and I was just ready to be a bride, wife and spouse. I was finally Mrs. P and married to my best friend.
Biggest regret about the wedding?
Our mic didn't work for the ceremony so if you were further than the first row seats you couldn't hear us say our vows. I wasn't mad about this at the time but as time went on and the more I thought about it, I became really angry about it. There's nothing I can do about it now but I wish the MC would have brought a back up or changed it out just for the time being with the reception mic (because that one worked). It was all very frustrating. And if I could do it all over again I would hire a professional videographer. In the end all you have left is pictures and videos of that day and I wish I would have hired someone to capture the feeling of those moments.
How was moving in together?
It was fine. Nothing drastic. He came to live with me but didn't bring any furniture just his TV, clothes, movies, pillows, blankets...coffee cups. Little things.
Has anything changed since you've gotten married?
Every day is different but we keep chugging along together. We change and grow together. We're still the same people we are when we got married. I think we feel more comfortable around each other. We more quick to say what's wrong if something is bothering us. But essentially we're still the same.
What's the number one thing you've learned during your first year of marriage?
No matter how much you think you know someone there is still a lot to learn. Moving in together and living right on top of each other will definitely show you how much you didn't know about a person before. I learned that I love being a wife. He gives me a new sense of purpose and has taught me patience and how to forgive quicker.
Do you have any relationship traditions?
We have such different schedules so I typically don't talk to him face to face until the evening rolls around so we text each other throughout the day. But a "tradition" we do is watch tv every night together before falling asleep. We also like to go for walks after dinner.
How do you make a long term relationship work?
Luckily we have great love role models in our lives. My parents have been married for 30 years now, his parents for 40+. Both our grandparents had very long marriages and so it feels like it's in our blood. We're not ones to turn and run at the sign of trouble. We know life has seasons and times of sorrow and woe will come but we need to be able to hold each other up during those times. Be honest, forgiving and open with each other. Do not rush into things. Don't get married just because everyone around you is getting engaged or having babies etc. You need to remind yourself that life is a journey, we don't all walk the same paths and you need to enjoy what God has given you. Take your time when you talk about engagements, marriage and kids. Oh, and also MARRY YOUR BEST FRIEND! It makes life that much more fun and enjoyable.
How do you balance your styles and harmony within the home?
Pick your battles. There are going to be annoying little habits that get on your nerves but learn to talk about it without being a nag, or just let it go. Remind yourself that you love them and reconnect physically each and every day. This can be a simple kiss or hug or even more romantic *wink* but make sure you touch each other in some way, you'll be amazed at how it makes you feel.
Do you get jealous?
I used to get jealous when I thought about his past with other girls. I'm self conscience and I would think I wasn't special or was better than anyone so what makes him stay with me? He could find someone much prettier, funnier, just all around better. He would have to reassure me a lot back then. Now that we're married I don't have those feelings anymore. I guess because he's only ever been married to me. I'm the only one so I turn it around and try to make other girls jealous that I took him off the market.
He is not a jealous person, but he says that the reasons he started dating me / married me was because he didn't want anyone else to have me!
What chores to each of you have?
I typically will do the laundry and the cooking. He does the yard work and the dishes. We don't necessarily say this is how it is but we usually just do it. It makes it easier on everyone because of the timing each of us is at home.
That's it for now! A quick snippet into our first year of marriage. I want to get my FAQ all about our wedding up soon so keep on the lookout for that one.
When do you feel like you were ready to get married?
I was ready around the 2 year mark of our relationship. I knew this was the man I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He was my best friend. He says he knew he wanted to marry me when I said we would do whatever it takes to get him through the $50k surgery he needed to have. It clicked for him in that moment that he just knew I was the one for him. Money wasn't an issue - I cared more about him and his health.
How long was your engagement?
We were engaged for one year. We got engaged on May 2, 2014 and our wedding was May 15, 2015. I specially asked for him to give me a year to plan the wedding because I wanted to enjoy my time as an engaged couple and really experience my time planning my wedding. I have a few friends who I know got married less than a month after the proposal and it worked for them but I knew that I wanted a longer time to really just be relaxed about the whole thing. I didn't want to be running around like crazy. I really took my time with everything.
What is your favorite memory from the wedding day?
I think having all the people I love in one room partying with us and just finally being married! We were together 4.5 year by the time we tied the knot and I was just ready to be a bride, wife and spouse. I was finally Mrs. P and married to my best friend.
Biggest regret about the wedding?
Our mic didn't work for the ceremony so if you were further than the first row seats you couldn't hear us say our vows. I wasn't mad about this at the time but as time went on and the more I thought about it, I became really angry about it. There's nothing I can do about it now but I wish the MC would have brought a back up or changed it out just for the time being with the reception mic (because that one worked). It was all very frustrating. And if I could do it all over again I would hire a professional videographer. In the end all you have left is pictures and videos of that day and I wish I would have hired someone to capture the feeling of those moments.
How was moving in together?
It was fine. Nothing drastic. He came to live with me but didn't bring any furniture just his TV, clothes, movies, pillows, blankets...coffee cups. Little things.
Has anything changed since you've gotten married?
Every day is different but we keep chugging along together. We change and grow together. We're still the same people we are when we got married. I think we feel more comfortable around each other. We more quick to say what's wrong if something is bothering us. But essentially we're still the same.
What's the number one thing you've learned during your first year of marriage?
No matter how much you think you know someone there is still a lot to learn. Moving in together and living right on top of each other will definitely show you how much you didn't know about a person before. I learned that I love being a wife. He gives me a new sense of purpose and has taught me patience and how to forgive quicker.
Do you have any relationship traditions?
We have such different schedules so I typically don't talk to him face to face until the evening rolls around so we text each other throughout the day. But a "tradition" we do is watch tv every night together before falling asleep. We also like to go for walks after dinner.
How do you make a long term relationship work?
Luckily we have great love role models in our lives. My parents have been married for 30 years now, his parents for 40+. Both our grandparents had very long marriages and so it feels like it's in our blood. We're not ones to turn and run at the sign of trouble. We know life has seasons and times of sorrow and woe will come but we need to be able to hold each other up during those times. Be honest, forgiving and open with each other. Do not rush into things. Don't get married just because everyone around you is getting engaged or having babies etc. You need to remind yourself that life is a journey, we don't all walk the same paths and you need to enjoy what God has given you. Take your time when you talk about engagements, marriage and kids. Oh, and also MARRY YOUR BEST FRIEND! It makes life that much more fun and enjoyable.
How do you balance your styles and harmony within the home?
Pick your battles. There are going to be annoying little habits that get on your nerves but learn to talk about it without being a nag, or just let it go. Remind yourself that you love them and reconnect physically each and every day. This can be a simple kiss or hug or even more romantic *wink* but make sure you touch each other in some way, you'll be amazed at how it makes you feel.
Do you get jealous?
I used to get jealous when I thought about his past with other girls. I'm self conscience and I would think I wasn't special or was better than anyone so what makes him stay with me? He could find someone much prettier, funnier, just all around better. He would have to reassure me a lot back then. Now that we're married I don't have those feelings anymore. I guess because he's only ever been married to me. I'm the only one so I turn it around and try to make other girls jealous that I took him off the market.
He is not a jealous person, but he says that the reasons he started dating me / married me was because he didn't want anyone else to have me!
What chores to each of you have?
I typically will do the laundry and the cooking. He does the yard work and the dishes. We don't necessarily say this is how it is but we usually just do it. It makes it easier on everyone because of the timing each of us is at home.
That's it for now! A quick snippet into our first year of marriage. I want to get my FAQ all about our wedding up soon so keep on the lookout for that one.
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