Two years have come and gone and I think wow...we've been married for two years already? And other times I'm like it's ONLY been two years?! Eric and I met and got together in 2010 so we've technically been together for seven years but we've been legal for only two years. So here are a few more questions after another year down...
Do you wish you did anything different on your wedding day in retrospect?
If I had more money I definitely would have done things different and more expensive. For example I would have definitely had a party bus from the picture location to the wedding venue. We were trying to save money so everyone ended up driving out there, some people car-pooled because it was really far, about 45 minutes from our picture location. I would have loved for everyone to have been on the bus having fun for 45 minutes but it just wasn't in our budget. Eric and I paid for the entire wedding ourselves so we were on a tight budget. I was fortunate enough for some people to step in at certain places, like my bridesmaids paying for the candy table, a friend paying for the flowers (I was just going to do silk flowers-less expensive and she bought me real ones), his parents paid for the rehearsal dinner and then my parents helped along the way too. So we had a little help but we definitely footed the big expenses and I personally would rather have people get a good meal and have a good time for the rest of the night so that's where to money went. But to answer the question, yes I would have had the party bus, a photo booth, colored tie backs for the chairs, and I would have bought extra favors for each seat.
What's the most challenging thing and most rewarding thing about being married?
The most challenging thing for me is learning that it's not just my decision any more. I'm a very controlling person by nature, my parents raise a very independent woman and sometimes I forget it's not just about what I think but what does my husband think. I do often think about asking Eric how he feels but my follow through isn't always as good...I'm working on that. And the most rewarding thing is I get my best friend every day. I do love living with him, he makes me laugh and brightens my day and it's great to watch our Piontkowski empire grow! haha
How do you celebrate your anniversary and do you just celebrate your wedding anniversary or your dating anniversary too?
Oh man! Do you want to know how we've spent our last two anniversaries?? We did absolutely nothing! And it's not that we don't care, it is a very special day to us we just didn't plan anything. We're so bad, we didn't even get each other cards but that's ok I don't think either one of us is upset about it. We tell each other we love them every day and that's good enough. We do not "celebrate" our dating anniversary but we do always tell each other happy anniversary on that day too (November 6th) and I always mention it on Facebook and tell the world how much I love him. So we do acknowledge BOTH anniversaries.
What's the hardest thing about living together?
That I have to share my space with someone else. Plain and simple. I'm use to doing things a certain way and products going in a certain place when someone moves or does something I don't it can irritate me. I'm working on that, just because it's not my way doesn't mean it's the wrong way. We've compromised on many things but there are certain things I do ask him to do... Like put the toilet paper roll on a certain way, close the shower curtain after the shower and put my products back exactly (and I mean exactly) the way I had them. I'm working on it ok!
Dating advice through high school and making it last until marriage?
I can't really answer this one because I met Eric way far out from High School. He was 27 and I was 21. None of my high school relationships last (for the better!) but I would just say don't force it. If it wasn't meant to be then it's not going to work out. Let it be natural too and flow either together with ease or apart. Eric and I both had past relationships that both just died but it wasn't because the others were terrible people we just drifted apart and knew ok they weren't the ones. So yeah, don't force it and remember that communication truly is key. Don't have any secrets between you and let the conversations be about important things but also the fun things too.
Do you think the first year is the hardest?
Yes. At least it was for us. I don't think it would necessarily be hard if you were already living together prior to getting married but we did not so it was a whole new world to me. I had to get used to him being there, ALL THE TIME. Him moving around my stuff, causing dirty dishes, leaving his socks in random places, moving my stuff and not putting it back. All these things used to irritated me so much. I would often get angry and that was hard for me. It was hard for me to let this guy move into my space and sharing what used to be all mine. I also think it can be hard because it no longer is his and mine, it's OUR stuff and that time of trying to win them over - so be on your best behavior act is over. You get to know the real them in the rawest form and I'm gonna be honest it took well over a year to get the hang of it. Now I love having him around all the time and doing everything together but it definitely was an adjustment at first.
How do you guys do your finances and do you budget?
YES WE BUDGET. We have to, I mean there it literally no other way for us to get by if we didn't budget. I want to do some more blogs on this topic of budgeting and saving money but yes we do. Every month we break our paychecks down so we know where every single dollar is planned to go for that month. Then during the month we have checks and balances so we can keep on track and then at the end of every month I go through and tally up all our money that was spent and see where it went and make sure it matches what we had budgeted for. If it's way off well then we need to sit down and talk through it. We are still paying off a surgery Eric had back in 2014 and now my surgery that I had in April 2017 so we have to know where every dollar goes. We use a combination of an excel spreadsheet I created on google sheets and www.everydollar.com - please go, check it out, its completely free to use. If you're having trouble getting a budget down or just simply don't know where to start, start there it'll walk you through the process and help you create and stay on track of your budget. As far as finances, we did not create a joint bank account and we did not combine accounts when we got married. And that's not because I don't trust him or he doesn't trust me. That was more for protection for us, if someone gets my bank information and takes ALL my money, well I know his money is still safe and we can use that until we can get the fraud case sorted out. I guess it goes with the saying don't put all your eggs in the same basket. Just an added layer of protection. BUT we do have access to each others accounts. When we said our I do's I put him on my account and he put me on his so we can transfer money, look at statements, add to the accounts etc but we do have my paychecks going into one and his paychecks going into another and we do not bank at the same bank. Again just another layer of protection.
When did you know they were the one and were there ever any doubts?
Eric says he knew I was the one when the Dr. said his surgery was going to cost 50k and I just said, okay let's get started. We were only dating at the time and he was more important to me than anything that I wanted to see him healthy and if that's what it was going to take then ok let's do it. He loved that and knew that I was the one for him.
I don't think mine was any one moment. I just saw his character and personality and I knew I liked him. He was great with kids, a good conversationalist, hard working, patient, loving, knowledgeable... just everything I knew I wanted in a husband and it was over time that I got to know him better and I just knew we were going to get married. Were there any doubts? Absolutely. I can't go into much detail now because I plan on revealing this whole adventure later but it made me doubt if I married the right person, if I was the right person for him etc. But I now know it was just bad thoughts, and the devil trying to get a hold of my thoughts and turn me against my husband. The person you married is the right person and you have to remind yourself that and work through the issues. Not question yourself every time you fight if you made the right decision, just say yes to yourself and move on.
And the most important question everyone keeps asking!
WHEN ARE THE BABIES COMING?!?!?!
Wouldn't you like to know
Marriage Questions - Year One
Marriage Questions - Year Three
Do you wish you did anything different on your wedding day in retrospect?
If I had more money I definitely would have done things different and more expensive. For example I would have definitely had a party bus from the picture location to the wedding venue. We were trying to save money so everyone ended up driving out there, some people car-pooled because it was really far, about 45 minutes from our picture location. I would have loved for everyone to have been on the bus having fun for 45 minutes but it just wasn't in our budget. Eric and I paid for the entire wedding ourselves so we were on a tight budget. I was fortunate enough for some people to step in at certain places, like my bridesmaids paying for the candy table, a friend paying for the flowers (I was just going to do silk flowers-less expensive and she bought me real ones), his parents paid for the rehearsal dinner and then my parents helped along the way too. So we had a little help but we definitely footed the big expenses and I personally would rather have people get a good meal and have a good time for the rest of the night so that's where to money went. But to answer the question, yes I would have had the party bus, a photo booth, colored tie backs for the chairs, and I would have bought extra favors for each seat.
What's the most challenging thing and most rewarding thing about being married?
The most challenging thing for me is learning that it's not just my decision any more. I'm a very controlling person by nature, my parents raise a very independent woman and sometimes I forget it's not just about what I think but what does my husband think. I do often think about asking Eric how he feels but my follow through isn't always as good...I'm working on that. And the most rewarding thing is I get my best friend every day. I do love living with him, he makes me laugh and brightens my day and it's great to watch our Piontkowski empire grow! haha
How do you celebrate your anniversary and do you just celebrate your wedding anniversary or your dating anniversary too?
Oh man! Do you want to know how we've spent our last two anniversaries?? We did absolutely nothing! And it's not that we don't care, it is a very special day to us we just didn't plan anything. We're so bad, we didn't even get each other cards but that's ok I don't think either one of us is upset about it. We tell each other we love them every day and that's good enough. We do not "celebrate" our dating anniversary but we do always tell each other happy anniversary on that day too (November 6th) and I always mention it on Facebook and tell the world how much I love him. So we do acknowledge BOTH anniversaries.
What's the hardest thing about living together?
That I have to share my space with someone else. Plain and simple. I'm use to doing things a certain way and products going in a certain place when someone moves or does something I don't it can irritate me. I'm working on that, just because it's not my way doesn't mean it's the wrong way. We've compromised on many things but there are certain things I do ask him to do... Like put the toilet paper roll on a certain way, close the shower curtain after the shower and put my products back exactly (and I mean exactly) the way I had them. I'm working on it ok!
Dating advice through high school and making it last until marriage?
I can't really answer this one because I met Eric way far out from High School. He was 27 and I was 21. None of my high school relationships last (for the better!) but I would just say don't force it. If it wasn't meant to be then it's not going to work out. Let it be natural too and flow either together with ease or apart. Eric and I both had past relationships that both just died but it wasn't because the others were terrible people we just drifted apart and knew ok they weren't the ones. So yeah, don't force it and remember that communication truly is key. Don't have any secrets between you and let the conversations be about important things but also the fun things too.
Do you think the first year is the hardest?
Yes. At least it was for us. I don't think it would necessarily be hard if you were already living together prior to getting married but we did not so it was a whole new world to me. I had to get used to him being there, ALL THE TIME. Him moving around my stuff, causing dirty dishes, leaving his socks in random places, moving my stuff and not putting it back. All these things used to irritated me so much. I would often get angry and that was hard for me. It was hard for me to let this guy move into my space and sharing what used to be all mine. I also think it can be hard because it no longer is his and mine, it's OUR stuff and that time of trying to win them over - so be on your best behavior act is over. You get to know the real them in the rawest form and I'm gonna be honest it took well over a year to get the hang of it. Now I love having him around all the time and doing everything together but it definitely was an adjustment at first.
How do you guys do your finances and do you budget?
YES WE BUDGET. We have to, I mean there it literally no other way for us to get by if we didn't budget. I want to do some more blogs on this topic of budgeting and saving money but yes we do. Every month we break our paychecks down so we know where every single dollar is planned to go for that month. Then during the month we have checks and balances so we can keep on track and then at the end of every month I go through and tally up all our money that was spent and see where it went and make sure it matches what we had budgeted for. If it's way off well then we need to sit down and talk through it. We are still paying off a surgery Eric had back in 2014 and now my surgery that I had in April 2017 so we have to know where every dollar goes. We use a combination of an excel spreadsheet I created on google sheets and www.everydollar.com - please go, check it out, its completely free to use. If you're having trouble getting a budget down or just simply don't know where to start, start there it'll walk you through the process and help you create and stay on track of your budget. As far as finances, we did not create a joint bank account and we did not combine accounts when we got married. And that's not because I don't trust him or he doesn't trust me. That was more for protection for us, if someone gets my bank information and takes ALL my money, well I know his money is still safe and we can use that until we can get the fraud case sorted out. I guess it goes with the saying don't put all your eggs in the same basket. Just an added layer of protection. BUT we do have access to each others accounts. When we said our I do's I put him on my account and he put me on his so we can transfer money, look at statements, add to the accounts etc but we do have my paychecks going into one and his paychecks going into another and we do not bank at the same bank. Again just another layer of protection.
When did you know they were the one and were there ever any doubts?
Eric says he knew I was the one when the Dr. said his surgery was going to cost 50k and I just said, okay let's get started. We were only dating at the time and he was more important to me than anything that I wanted to see him healthy and if that's what it was going to take then ok let's do it. He loved that and knew that I was the one for him.
I don't think mine was any one moment. I just saw his character and personality and I knew I liked him. He was great with kids, a good conversationalist, hard working, patient, loving, knowledgeable... just everything I knew I wanted in a husband and it was over time that I got to know him better and I just knew we were going to get married. Were there any doubts? Absolutely. I can't go into much detail now because I plan on revealing this whole adventure later but it made me doubt if I married the right person, if I was the right person for him etc. But I now know it was just bad thoughts, and the devil trying to get a hold of my thoughts and turn me against my husband. The person you married is the right person and you have to remind yourself that and work through the issues. Not question yourself every time you fight if you made the right decision, just say yes to yourself and move on.
And the most important question everyone keeps asking!
WHEN ARE THE BABIES COMING?!?!?!
Wouldn't you like to know
Marriage Questions - Year One
Marriage Questions - Year Three
Comments
Post a Comment