Skip to main content

August 8, 2017 - I Feel Guilty For Being Pregnant

It’s hard not to feel guilty during this infertility journey. I still can’t believe I’m pregnant. This is something I battled within myself for some time now, that it might never had happened for us. But God had bigger plans. We are currently five weeks and two days pregnant today, a miracle within itself.

It is today though that I find out one of my precious friends who also has gone on her own infertility journey, has miscarried again. My heart completely breaks for her and I’m not sure how to process the news. She does have a beautiful daughter, a rainbow baby after so many years of trying but that doesn’t stop the hurt from this most recent loss. I feel guilty. I feel bad for sharing the wonderful news that I am pregnant, and talking about my betas and how I’m feeling when internally she has been dealing with her loss.

I know this isn’t my fault. I know God has a bigger plan for us all. One in which we cannot begin to comprehend the outcome. I know that I should not feel bad for myself for being pregnant but sometimes I can’t help it. I began to think about all the ladies who still haven’t been able to get pregnant in my Support Groups. What about them? When will it be their turn? It took us one year to get pregnant and if you didn’t know our story you would think that’s “normal.” Couples can take anywhere from 6 months to a year of trying to conceive so I totally get looking at us and not thinking it was a big deal that it took us exactly a year. Some women wait decades to be called mother. I am beyond thankful to be in the position that I am in. I thank God every day for the chance to carry life within me but my heart hurts today because I know women, some very personally, who are still waiting for their miracle.

I don’t know what lays in store for you or for the future. I don’t know why things happen the way they do or in the timing that they do. All I can say is that I still think about my struggling friends often. I pray for them every night, if not by name then by circumstance.


Does it ever get easier?
Labels:

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Free Samples and Offers

I wanted to get this out soon as possible as I know the Holidays are upon us and everyone is looking to save some money this time of year. This post is geared towards parents of multiples but if you have singletons please feel free to reach out to the companies below too for some free samples and offers, but please be aware some offers might not apply to you. If you’re like me then the minute your babies were born you were online looking at deals and ways to save money. I came across a lot of blog posts and articles stating if you contact this company then they will send you this product free. I thought how true is this? So I put them to the test. I took many lists from the internet and combined it into one giant list of baby product companies; I then emailed and mailed each company requesting free samples due to the birth of my twin girls. Below you will find the responses I received. Some companies were great, while others were….off putting. I included coupon codes I found o...
Post a Comment
Read more

Christmas Jar DIY

I really should have made a video but I didn't have time and I really wanted to get this up before Christmas is too far over.   I'm going to be making four Christmas jars filled with goodies to give out as little gifts with Christmas cards. I'll be making the Grinch, Santa, Rudolph, and Frosty. This is not my original idea, I found this online.   Supplies Needed: Jelly jars (8oz) in the quantity of your desire Something to fill the jar with. I used eatable items for each.  Hot glue gun For Santa: Craft Belt Buckle Black Ribbon Red & White Mints Instructions: Fill jar with the red & white mints. Cut a black ribbon the width of the jar and then thread on a craft belt buckle. I found the belt buckles at Hobby Lobby. Hot glue the ribbons with the buckle around the middle of the jar. For Grinch: Small Red Heart Red Ribbon Green Andy's Mints   Instructions: Fill the jar with the Andy's Mints. I got mine at the Dolla...
Post a Comment
Read more

My God Wants Me To Trust Him

Lately I've been feeling really worried about a procedure I have coming up. In January it seemed like such a far off thing but now as the days tick by I'm getting so nervous. I have feelings of doubt and fear; what if this doesn't work? How are we going to pay for all this? What if things go wrong? What if I die? All extremely scary stuff. But then I remember that people go through this all the time, every day. I'm going to be ok no matter the outcome because my trust is in God and not the doctors.  Psalm 37:5 Commit everything you do to the Lord; trust Him and He will help you. Psalm 56:3 - 4 Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in you. In God I will praise His word, in God I have put my trust; I will not fear what flesh can do unto me.  Psalm 56:9 - 13 When I cry out to You, then my enemies will turn back; this I know, because God is for me. In God I will praise His Word, in the Lord I will praise His word, in God I have put my trust; I will not be afraid. What...
Post a Comment
Read more